I woke up at 4am on the day of New Year’s Eve and did some journaling about the past year and some accomplishments and experiences I’d had. I love to journal and started this practice of journaling several years ago to help me reflect, celebrate, commiserate and release anything I was ready to let go of.
Do you ever journal at the end of the year?
Well here we are at the start of the new year and we have much to look forward to! As my friend, coach and colleague Morgana Rae describes in her blog about how resolutions suck, we Do put a Ton of pressure on ourselves right at the beginning of the year to change things almost Instantly!
And as Tony Robbins says, most of us Overestimate what we can do in a year and Underestimate what we can do in a decade. I find this to be So True! I often witness this with the clients that I coach (its always easier to see in others things that are hard to see in ourselves!).
Folks tend to set SUUper High Expectations when creating a new goal and want to achieve it in a SILLY amount of short time! Not only is this approach UN-Kind to yourself, its Also — UN-Productive!!
The Great Thing about Goals is that they GET US GOING! That is what they are designed to do! Thats what they are For!
When Goals become UN-helpful is when they are the stick that we use to beat ourselves over the head with! Like, when has That ever worked?
Honestly, So Many of us fall into the trap of thinking “Well, if I don’t PUSH myself (often in an unhealthy way!), then I’ll never do it!” Its like we are stuck in old school of hard knocks approach to parenting, only we are turning it against ourselves.
What ends up Happening, is that when you don’t fulfil X Big Scary Goal within Y Crazy Short Time Period, you get mad at yourself and can even end of thinking you’re a failure! How productive will you be, if you’re calling yourself a loser for not executing this crazy big thing?
Before long, your brain starts to associate goals with pain and failure! How long can you keep pushing through that?
Which bring us to our….
5 Goal Setting Tips for a Happy and Productive 2018 !!
- Be Kind!
- Set goals that are a bit of a stretch but still achievable (ie. you don’t have to Kill yourself to “Make It”) This will help your brain associate goals with success and pleasure (ie. did anyone say endorphine rush?!!)
- Celebrate successes!
- We tend to focus on misteps and overlook our successes! Taking the time to celebrate even a small success in a small way (even a high five with a friend, taking a short break or a long candlelit bath can be good ways to party ; ) ). Again, we want to create positive associations with reaching our goals!
- Focus on Progress!
- If we get stuck in perfection, its over! I recently visited my brother who is a big health/workout guy (with all the muscle-ys to prove it : ) ) and he talks about the exact same things that I coach my clients on – focus on Showing Up! He allows himself to go to the gym and if he wants to turn around and leave the moment that he gets there, he will and he is totally ok with that! I take a similar approach to writing – if I write for 5 minutes, I’m happy!! If I want to stop there, Awesome! I Did It! Yay : )
- Choose One Thing!
- Often, we get stuck in FOBLO (Fear Of Being Left Out) – which for goal setting shows up as “If I don’t include a goal in every category – body, money, mind, spirit, then I will just drop those balls!” However, when you do Everything, you Do…Nothing! The neat part, is that when we choose to focus on one thing, you’ll tend to see improvements naturally in other areas – try it!!
- Make it Fun for You!
- Whatever that means! You can get some friends in on it, you can day dream about it, you can dance before or after you work on your goal – whatever gets you in the mood! Literally ; ) The more fun this is for you, the More You Will Want To DO It!
Much Love to You and Happy Goal Setting!!
Please join me this Tuesday for a free webinar on setting your goals for this year! Click here to sign up!